Book Resources

What follows is the entire list of disqualifiers for the study with 600 persons from Central Alberta who listed qualities they knew they would not marry. These are rank ordered form the most frequently cited to the least frequently cited.  The first 25 differ slightly form the first 25 in The Compatibility Code because we combined some categories for that list.  There are 113 items in the list.

1. Substance abuse
2. Smokes
3. Non-Christian
4. Sexually promiscuous
5. Unsanitary
6. Abusive
7. Dishonest
8. Low IQ
9. Physically unattractive
10. Different denomination
11. Drinks
12. Lazy
13. Lacks humor/ not fun
14. Overweight
15. Hates children
16. Unemployed
17. Selfish
18. Financial problems
19. Controlling/domineering
20. Personality mismatch
21. Antisocial
22. No respect
23. Unmotivated/lacking ambition
24. Different interests
25. Proud
26. Problems with in laws or friends
27. Anger problems
28. Pessimistic
29. Poor
30. Narrow and opinionated
31. Emotionally unstable
32. Different values
33. Prejudiced/racist
34. Doesn’t trust
35. Diseased
36. Jealous/codependent
37. Divorced
38. Significant age discrepancy
39. Unloving
40. Uncaring
41. Insensitive
42. Ex-wife or kids from former relationship
43. Communication difficulties
44. Addictions
45. Narcissistic
46. Non-family oriented
47. Immature
48. Spendthrift, expensive tastes
49. Body hair
50. Critical
51. Criminal background
52. Unkind
53. Workaholic
54. Depressive
55. Un-athletic
56. Different ethnicity
57. Handicaps
58. Impatient
59. Flirtatious
60. Controlling
61. Hatred/bitterness
62. Low self esteem
63. Don’t share similar goals
64. Irresponsible
65. Bad habits
66. Stingy
67. Hates animals
68. Poor manners
69. Not a virgin
70. Not a vegetarian
71. immobile
72. Different political party
73. Shallow
74. Excessive emotionality, cries a lot
75. Greedy
76. Problems with commitment
77. Worldly minded
78. Weak convictions
79. Doesn’t attend church
80. Not sexy
81. Unaffectionate
82. Not articulate or witty
83. Height discrepancy
84. Hates the outdoors
85. Boring
86. Doesn’t like or love me
87. Parties too much
88. Background differences
89. Indecisive
90. Can’t cook
91. We don’t enjoy each other
92. Profanity
93. Intemperate
94. Not romantic
95. Passive
96. Too young
97. Unforgiving
98. From a broken home
99. Needy
100. Not genuine
101. Not musical
102. Annoying personal characteristics
103. Not accepting
104. Talks too much
105. Argumentative
106. Lacks teachable spirit
107. Expedient
108. Can’t parent
109. Weak
110. Distance relationship
111. Dogmatic
112. Doesn’t challenge me
113. Overly idealistic